Sargon's Valentine's Day, Part 1

"Hey, girl. It's me. Sargon. You know...the sorcerer."

"Whatcha doin' hanging out on this solo gaming blog, girl? It's almost Valentine's Day. That's the day when you need to be with somebody... somebody who can conjure you some marshmallow hot cocoa or massage your feet with the power of chthonic energy or organize your scrapbook by manipulating the fabric of reality. Forget the 9Qs and let's get into the 2Y's - that's 'you' and 'me' - no, wait, I mean the 2M's - that's 'me' and 'you' - umm, that's not right either. Well, you get the idea." 

"I'm sorry, what's that, girl? You're Harley Quinn, criminally psychotic girlfriend of the Joker? Oh. This is awkward. I thought you were a waitress at Chili's, you know, 'cause of the outfit and all. Listen, I'm sorry I hit on you. We don't need the Joker to hear about this, right?"

"S#!+."

"I can't face Joker, Harley, Clayface, Killer Croc, and Dr. Phosphorous alone! I'm summoning the Birds of Prey to help me! Lady Blackbird, Katana, Oracle, Black Canary, Lady Shiva, and Huntress! WO! The Birds of Prey don't believe in pants! Sweet!"

"Must...fight urge...to make jokes...about...cute girl in wheelchair... Got to...summon the strength of the gods...or this blog...is...finished!"

"The battle started off with my gals looking mighty fine! Harley and the freaks were lumbering across the roof of the power plant while Lady Blackbird piloted four of the Birds into striking range. It was a great maneuver for terrain like this: the freaks can't do much next turn, and the four Birds are ready to attack. What could go wrong?"

"EARTHQUAKE!"

To be continued...